Sugar and Spice


I came across this photo the other day; it simultaneously made me happy and sad. It captures the sweetness of sugar and spice.  A quick perusal reveals the purple dress and curls. Imagine if she would but peek over her shoulder, we would see the big eyes full of innocence. And gosh golly, I wish I had those flexible young knees.

But what I appreciate the most is the Lego she is building. I know this family, so I know that this Lego is there for her and her older sister, not a brother or cousin, and note: it is not “girl” Lego, it is just the good ole regular kind. Not that there is anything wrong with girl Lego, except that it should not be all a child gets when there are so many options out there. One of my grandsons used to be Batman, so he would only build in black or sometimes very, very dark gray. It would be very difficult to be Batman, if all you had was pretty little girl Lego.

It was my grandsons’ Lego adventures that made me aware of how careless I had been of my three daughters. I never gave them Legos, and with Lego building going on all around the house, my daughters now tell me now how much they love Legos. How they wished someone had given them Legos when they were young.

Well I’m peeved. I missed out on the opportunity to play Legos with my daughters, and I tell you, it sure would have been nice to have had an occasional rest from changing all those dang nabbit Barbie clothes. Well, secretly I did enjoy making Ken the slave that did all the work while having to get married to a new Barbie every day. Married every day? Well yes, because you know those Barbies had to have somewhere to wear all those dang nabbit dresses. Hum….I am not sure, but I think all Ken ever got to wear was an apron. Yep, that would definitely make him my favorite, for many reasons.

This photo made me think about the reality that, as women in American society, we have so many options available as long as we don’t limit our choices to the extremes in either direction. We can be tutu wearing princesses and master builders; sugar and spice and a fierce warrior all at the same time. It doesn’t have to be one or the other. Just don’t lose sight of the fact that it is nice to have a Ken around to do the heavy lifting, and well, if you get married every day there is that honeymoon every night.

Enough said of happiness, let’s address the sadness. My sadness is for my sons and grandsons. For I may joke about men only being necessary for what they can do for us, and this attitude is a large part of the problem, but truly, in our efforts to bring ourselves forward, we women are in danger of relegating men to the background. Let’s be better than that, and abandon the outdated mantra of repression.


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