Having admitted my defeat in the Great Grass War, or perhaps it would better be called a withdrawal of the one remaining troop (me), which yes technically is defeat I guess, but……… Okay okay, no excuses, here goes, I capitulate to the grasses deeply rooted existence; it wins.
However, having decided to let the place, house and yard, fall apart around me, and only address absolute emergencies as they arise, has bought about an unexpected wonderful sense of relieve.
Now I can concentrate on evaluating belongs, and making order out of the chaos that has gotten out of control within the walls of my castle. I can also start making plans on how I am going to use the many mountains of fabric and notions and patterns and so on so forth I have inherited from my grandmothers, and mothers, decades worth of accumulation. Perhaps there is a retirement lurking within?
So with the letting go, with my decision to once again become rootless, I have gained a victory in the form of peace of mind. For with the abandonment of this house, I will also be shedding the perpetual instability and unhappiness that comes with it.
Hence, without regret, I surrender all.