50:24 To what are you addicted?
There was a time I would have answered the likes upon this blog. I was obsessed and checking the stats constantly. Then my son and I were talking one day about addiction to smart phones because of the dopamine loop.
Well the light bulb came on and I made the connection to my behavior, and I was really far gone by this time. Even to the point of randomly waking up in the middle of the night, and the first thing that would pop into my mind was to check how my latest post was doing.
This was just not acceptable. So I would delete all followers, remove likes and comments, and walk away from the whole thing in extreme frustration.
However then I would realize that I was keeping myself from two activities I really enjoy; reading and writing with an interactive audience. This was also unacceptable.
Anyway, now that I am aware of the connection I am more careful, and if from time to time I find I am fixating upon it too much, I make my blog private until the need for a fix dissipates to nothingness.
Not the best of solutions, but with an obsessive personality like mine, necessary.
Besides if I really wanted to write about an addiction I cannot seem to tame, I could write a novel on stress eating for comfort, because that is where the real demons in my life lie.
And they’re killing me inch by excessive inch….sigh.
The Lord your God in your midst,
The Mighty One, will save;
He will rejoice over you with gladness,
He will quiet you with His love,
He will rejoice over you with singing.