And I Shall

“Trouble and anguish have overtaken me,
Yet Your commandments are my delights.
The righteousness of Your testimonies is everlasting;
Give me understanding, and I shall live.“

Psalm 119:143-144

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With all my Heart, My Soul, My Mind!

I find myself almost exuberant as of late. Not completely, because well, that is just not the way I roll. For unfortunately I have this gloomy parasite, which has latched onto my brain, always challenging, and actively whispering, no shouting at me, that this elevation of spirits is only a figment of my imagination, thus it manages to dim the light at the end of the tunnel.

Regardless, the thing is, I have long been waiting on the Lord. For He has been whispering, politely, not shouting as my intruder tends to do, that He has plans for me. And to be honest I am a bit terrified of what those plans might be, but I have learned the hard way to not get in my own way, and to let the Lord run the show. He is obviously so much better at it than I am.

Therefore maybe I should say I am cautiously curious with a liberal dose of nerves, instead of terrified. For strangely for me, I am actually not afraid of what’s ahead. So yes, terrified was the wrong choice in this circumstance.

However, waiting is not one of my strengths. I trend to the exact opposite. I would prefer to be doing something, even the wrong something, rather than to be patiently waiting for help or resolutions not of my own making.

This is definitely a character flaw, and I am currently working on it; even if I don‘t want to be. For it seems that the Lord has decided it is time to flatten out this deep deep wrinkle in my behavior pattern of a life time of leaping before looking, and gosh golly almighty can His iron get hot when He press His point home.

Sigh….as usual with my rambles I have drifted from where I started and meandered into who knows what. So I am just going to let all that above lie there and die a thousand deaths, while I return to where my thoughts were when I started this post.

I was seeing a possible future flickering out there which would be better than I could have ever chosen or conjured for myself, and how I am so afraid, yes of this I am afraid, so afraid to let myself want it, want it beyond the moon and back. I don’t want to leap prematurely and let the joy bounce off the clouds, because as my parasite so gleefully lets me know, when has anything ever been so good, and why should it be?

In the end, what that annoying voice has to say is irrelevant, because celebration is not what is called for at this time, patience is. I have to be still and let things unfold as they will or won’t, and be okay with the outcome. So I am waiting, as I should, and thanking the Lord that I am becoming good at it, finally.

But maybe perhaps instead, I will use some of this joy to shout from the roof tops, well maybe not rooftops, that would be way to exuberant, that I love the Lord my God, and I will no matter the future He has for me. This I know for sure and certain, and nothing, no nothing, will ever change this wondrous reality. Even that annoying naysayer I carry around with me will never have the last word on this one.

Blessings, Belinda

“Your testimonies I have taken as a heritage forever,

For they are the rejoicing of my heart.

I have inclined my heart to perform Your statutes

Forever to the very end”

” Psalm 119:111

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Simple, Purposeful, Passionate.

I always have a hard time writing about a book I have read. I am not a reviewer, but a reader. Still, this is one of those books I am recommending to my family, so I figured why not do so on here too.

It is an interesting presentation of stepping up and following God’s plan for your life, even if you’re doing it alone. This is a theme that has resonated with me since I become a Christian. This of course is a very simplistic overview and there is much more to the book than that, but it stresses that the Christian walk is not complicated, that in actuality it is very straight forward when stripped to its core.

Anyway, this is one of those books which I run across now and then, where your reading along thinking okay, yep, I get that, and it’s different enough to keep me up at night. When bam! there’s a sentence which changes my world view. One that brings the reading to a dead stop, and I have to chew on it, roll it around in my head, and enjoy it’s newness.

Thus I recommend, and hope it gives you the same pleasure it gave me.

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With Humble Trepidation

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I just picked up How to Read Proverbs by Tremper Longman III. Well right smack dab on the first page of the first chapter he leads in with a thought that made me have to pause and chew on it a bit.

“The Bible has a word to describe the person who navigates life well; that word is “wise.” 

What can I do with that but fall on my knees and beseech the Lord God to pass a little wisdom my way, for a life well lived would be something indeed.

Then I had to pause and bring my thought process to a dead stop, because gosh golly almighty He has passed His wisdom on, and I am about to journey through it with Tremper Longman III. (What a name huh, I cannot help myself, I might just have to type it again, Tremper Longman III 🙂

And perhaps I should finish with the thought, that for me, a life well lived would be one where all I do, every breath I take, and my every thought held captive, for the soul purpose of bringing glory to God.

This should be fun.

❤️Belinda

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